Loloy

Loloy

“Uncle, on your vacation this coming June, I will be getting married and you will be my main sponsor. So please don’t postpone your vacation because I especially set this date so that you can attend...” the letter from Loloy says.

Loloy is my nephew; well... a special nephew. What made him so special is the fact that he was born with a handicap: harelip and a cleft palate.

I think Loloy was seven or eight years old when he became the apple of my father’s eye. My father would bring him anywhere he went: church, movie, park, restaurant, and even to the farm. They developed a special bond, as if they were of the same age or level. They slept in one room, eat together, went out together, take a bath together, they do everything together. Even when Loloy’s family had to transfer to Manila, Loloy chose to be left behind in the province with his grandfather. They were inseparable.

I remember a time when my father had a hard cough after a day’s work and Loloy reprimand him like an old man saying, “That’s what you get when you overwork yourself in the farm!”

“If I don’t work in the farm, we have nothing to eat.” father reasoned.

“Then, sell the damn farm!” Loloy retorted angrily as if an adult talking to another adult as mother and I could just chuckle overhearing their seemingly adult talk.

Going to the kinder school for Loloy was not really a big problem. I mean I knew that his classmates teased him and laughed at his speech impediment but instead of getting angry or withdraw in self-pity, he would just laugh with them. And the more his classmates laughed, the more he spoke showing off his defective pronunciation, to the delight of everyone. And this attitude had earned Loloy the respect of his classmates. Everyone was his friend.

Personally I admire his happy disposition because if I were in his shoes and being mimicked, I would probably pursue the mimicking bastard and kick him in the butt. But Loloy was different; he would just smile, unaffected by the verbal abuse as if he heard nothing at all. And every time I witness such cruelty, my heart breaks. I knew that Loloy suffered it in silence.

Loloy was fourteen when he went under the knife to correct his impairment. He was supposed to undergo three operations; first on his lips and the other two on his cleft. But on the second operation, he almost died of hemorrhage. So he decided to keep his speech defect forever. “What use will it be if I can speak well but I’m already dead?” He would reason.

So even if he still had his handicap, he still continued to be the lively boy that everyone respected and loved. And my father was always there for him. He knew his pains and sufferings.

“Grandpa, do you think I will be able to have a girl friend one day? Will a girl want to take for his boyfriend a man like me?”

“You know, Loloy, if a person is really meant for you, both of you will be together. But, that is in God’s time. Just pray hard that you will find her. Look at me, who would have thought your grandmother would end up marrying me? I was a big bastard and a drunkard? And I pestered your grandmother all the time, hahahahaha!?” My father would tell his experience to give Loloy a boost.

“Really grandpa?”

“Yeah. But why... is there any special girl now?”

“Yeah but she doesn’t like me and I heard from a friend why; it’s because of my handicap” Loloy would confide sadly.

“Ah, you’re in love! Hahahaha!” My father would laugh to reassure that it was ok to experience rejection. “Don’t worry Loloy. As I said, if the right girl comes, she will come and she would love you for everything you are. Don’t worry about this girl, she surely isn’t the one for you.... Do you really love her that much?”

“Yeah...”

“Oh I see... Well, too bad for her, she doesn’t know what she is missing.”

“Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!Ha!” Then the two of them would laugh together.

“Ok, grandpa, let’s go fishing”

That’s how the two of them would spend their time bonding, relaxing and comforting each other.

After a few years, father died. I knew that the pain of losing my father had a profound effect on Loloy. For him, he lost not only a grandfather but a best friend, a confidant an ally, and an inspiration. We thought Loloy’s outlook in life would change upon father’s demise. But he remained to be the optimistic nephew that I knew.

Since I worked abroad, I hadn’t heard so much about Loloy anymore, except on special occasions as birthday, Christmas or any important family matters; until this letter coming from Loloy himself. As I looked back, I knew of Loloy to be just the little boy who wished upon a star to have his dream come true. And after some struggles with the difficulties and complexities of life, now he is happily telling me that he was almost there.

How I wish my father to be here to share the happiness that Loloy feel and to witness the realization of his beloved grandson’s dream. But right where he belongs now, I know that he is watching, smiling on Loloy’s happiness.

Then I read the last line of his letter, “PS. Uncle, please don’t forget your present for me and for my fiancee! Love, Loloy and Menchie”